I will die if light touches me.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
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