they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize