Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
