Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
