Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize