But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize
