Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
