You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
