Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
