Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
