i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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