i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Randomize
