You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
