it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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