where am i from again
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
