so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
