Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Randomize
