Sponge bath it is.
You can't motorboat a personality
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Randomize
