It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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