So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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