im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
