Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize
