Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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