Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
There are leaves in my underwear?
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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