I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
he wants to bone in the snuggie
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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