are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I don't think brook has ever known best
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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