When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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