I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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