you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize