if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize
