i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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