Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Randomize