is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
the day after is always just damage control
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
