So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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