tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
