Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
