we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
