They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Randomize