just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
