so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
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