The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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