YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
