I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
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