i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
