so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
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