you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Randomize