Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Michael Bay diarrhea
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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