yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
my liver is dry heaving
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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