We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
