Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
